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Sunday, February 28, 2010

Wolfish

your voice sent shivers along my skin,
a wolfish whisper outside my door
that i wanted so badly to let in.
you huffed and puffed, you laughed and sighed-
my brick wall had crumbled,
but i didn't care at the time.
the threat of your bite,
though, still weighed on my mind-
neat little rows of tiny sharp knives,
ready to scar.
"watch out for my back," you said,
"that's where the sharpest teeth are."
i felt no danger when i touched your face,
i feared no attack while within your embrace,
but i learned the truth of that warning
when you left me one day;
strangely silent
after our final retirement
on the dewy hillside,
having just watched the sky
with our fingers entwined.
yet you breezed frigidly past,
and the teeth in your back snapped
shut on my heart. you continued to leave,
but i was too startled to think
of any reasons why you should have stayed.
It's quite some time later,
now; my scars have just faded
into strong metal bars
reinforcing my wall,
never to crumble like it did once before.
you'll be the last wolf to get past my doors.










I feel as if this one is abnormally lengthy, for some reason.
Oh, fun fact!-
"Watch out for my back, that's where the sharpest teeth are," is an actual quote from a true life experience.
I thought it was an odd thing for him to say, but it's really been quite inspiring.

Friday, February 26, 2010

Recover

The tissues and teardrops
that follow heartbreak and hardknocks
are absolutely useless, as far as I can see.
None of that crying
or dramatization can do anything
to help me get back on my feet.
Instead I should pause, think,
and continue to breathe deep.
I can't pick up the pieces
if I'm clutching my chest,
so put all that weeping and wailing to rest!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Lungs

I have to force myself
to breathe occasionally,
like my body breaks down
or forgets how to run and
needs a little push to start
again. It’s like my lungs
are trying to remind me
that while my heart may hurt
sometimes, I will always have
that urge to be alive.








Also a true story.
A friend made a comment one day about how I was sighing so much, which made me realize that I would stop breathing for a bit and then have to take this huge breath to catch up on oxygen.
It's pretty weird.

Monday, February 22, 2010

Numbing

Winter, please hold me.
I want to feel frigid arms
squeezing the warmth from my heart,
I want to paint my insides white
and feel the ice
rush inside
the sudden emptiness of me.
If you could make
me like the snow,
then I would only take
a record of love leaving
but not really feel anything
when it goes.








True Facts.
Sometimes I want to be numb to things.
But then I remember that everything is beautiful (in its own way), and I take it back.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Branded

The burden presses each capital
hot-metal-letter
into my chest, burning a word
where I let your love rest.
Deaf to
Please!,
mute to
Stay!,
blind to everything else
that doesn’t smell of smoke and cold
earth and pheromones. Someday
I’ll be free of
this, I know;
but how much further
down this road?







(I don't know...)
This is one of those that just sat there forEVER and bugged me until I slapped something at the end so I could say that I finished it.
But I still love it, so there. ♥

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Shock

It’s like I’m in shock,
as if my heart is stopped
(except that I know that it’s not,
because it’s beating so fast!)
I don’t know whether I should laugh
or cry, or just crawl into a hole and die,
I don’t know I don’t know
I really just don’t have a clue what to do.
What is this feeling?
Am I feeling anything?
I don’t know I don’t know
I’m not entirely sure what I feel for you,
but if you’re willing to try
then so am I.






For serious.
I feel like I'm in one of those cartoons, where something goes by so fast that somebody is left spinning & then they get all dizzy with little birds or something.
Exactly like that right now.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Slips

Heartbeat skips, trips,
passes and fumbles, slips
and slides down that slope again.
I thought I wanted to just be friends?






Just a short little thing so I didn't feel guilty about completely ignoring V-Day.
Not that I really like this holiday, since I think we should celebrate love every day, but whatever, you know? I'm cool with it.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Unique

I seek solace in my speakers,
in my pen and papers,
in a story, and in sunlight.
I feel most lovely at midnight,
when the stars are shining
in the sky. British humor
makes me laugh,
and I’d rather take a bath
than a shower
at any hour. These things
make me unique,
and I love them about me.









Ooh, another poem about me.
How original,
[not].

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Body

Dear Heart, please get with the program.
Every other organ
knows that the hard truth of this situation
will never change,
so we’d all appreciate
if you stopped playing this game
and just let Brain win.
Dear Heart, we hate to say that we told you so
and rub salt in your wounds, but…
we definitely warned you,
you know we did.







It's like this: I KNOW that I shouldn't feel this way. But I do, and it's really annoying.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Oceanic

I want to whisper waves against
your shoreline silhouette,
crashing my fingertips against your skin
and folding them in
to your oceanic heart until we forget
everything except
the lullaby tide
that is
us
just
breathing.








Strangely, love is always connected to the ocean in my mind.
Okay, maybe not so strange now that I think about it.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Tragedy

I was mostly sad to see the scar fade,
after wishing so much that it would stay.
Wouldn’t it be nice, I had thought,
as a reminder not to let the ice inside my heart
thaw out. What a tragedy that would be,
if I had to feel things deeply
once more.








Ugh.
I want a boyfriend.
Soulmates are so hard to come by these days.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Contentment

So I had this dream where I was dancing
with this guy while I was only wearing
a towel. Then he laid down on the tile,
and I laid down next to him, and we just
watched each other. It sounds weird now, but it
was so peaceful and comfortable and
just nice-feeling in general, I think.









7 lines, 10 beats per.
I don't think "nice-feeling" is a word, but it stays until I look something up that fits better.
He's very handsome, by the way.